It's always bugs me that we can't say somethings because it's "ignorant" or "offensive." But honestly, do we even know why it's offensive? What does it mean for something to be offensive?
The definition of Offensive is "causing someone to feel deeply hurt, upset, or angry" or "actively aggressive; attacking." Now say I'm naming my food truck the Communist Panda. Or I see someone write their student ID number to sign in, rather than writing their actual name like everyone else, and I say they're like a Nazi Refugee. Or maybe I make a joke and say a fly, that keeps bugging me and will die because because it's smaller than me and I'll squish it, is like a suicide bomber. Why are these offensive? I'm just trying to make a joke, comment on the world around me, trying to have a clever name for a food truck that I want everyone to remember because it's so clever. I am not attacking anyone personally. So these must be offensive because someone feels hurt or upset. Ok, why? I'm just refering to the factual comparison. Suicide bombers attack someone innocent and die by doing so. So does that fly that keeps trying to eat my food and give me rabies. The nazi refugees did have numbers as names, and that one kid who signed in with a number is identifying with the number because they signed in with it. In making these comparisons, I'm not saying the person is a horrendous person, nor am I saying they are victims. Why does this hurt anyone?
I find it nice that we live in a world where victims of discrimination, stereotypes, and other slurrs can turn to society for moral support. But we also need to think about the suspect offender. Doesn't he/she get a say in defending themselves without the bias of everyone thinks the victim is innocent, so the offender must have been bad and offensive and mean. Maybe both are neutral and the victim is just sensitive.
"Words are only as offensive as the intent or, if you're super sensitive, as offensive as you allow them to be," quoted by a babycenter user. As inappropriate as Donald Trump is, he is correct in saying we cannot just go by what is politically correct. We need a moment to stop and think about why it's correct. And let the "politically wrong" people have a fair say. Otherwise, the "politically correct" will be like the initial anti-discrimination society, where whites are hated and treated as blacks were treated. This is not right. This is not the solution. The solution is discussion. And we should only be offended if people make personal assumptions or attack us personally. Or someone you care about is attacked.
What I find offensive? If someone assumes that all asians are smart, and comes up to a asian person and says "Why are you all so smart?" That is offensive because it's attributing something to a person that isn't true. Or if you wear a sari but know nothing about indian culture. But if you know the culture and speak the language, it's fine, there's nothing offensive. If someone finds it discomforting, that's more jealousy, not really offensive emotions.
Now, the reason I am writing this is because I commonly hear people making jokes that seem offensive, but everyone laughs like it's ok. But when I try to make similar jokes, somehow everyone can spot that I've said something wrong. Comment if you have similar experiences, or would like to explain why something is offensive to you and why something might not be offensive.
Lil' Life
Monday, September 14, 2015
Friday, June 26, 2015
Chronic Anosmia
Imagine growing up. In your world you interact with people and everyone if warm, loving, and everything seems normal. You learn that people breath in through their noses and they say "this smells good!" Or "This is really sweet." You try it. Nothing new from doing this, but you assume its just what people do. You're now old enough to go to school, and it's reccess. Everyone in the next room runs out screaming It's so stinky!! He farted!!" You have no idea what that means so curiosity tells you to check it out. Nothing different about the room. You try what people call "smelling" and still you don't sense anything different. Odd. Later, mom buys you a scented doll who smells like strawberries. You put your nose up to the doll and sniff. Nothing. You tell mom "I don't smell anything." She looks at you funny, smells the doll, then waves her hand "Oh its ok, there's not much scent left on her." You think something's off, but you don't want to tell mom she's wrong. After all, mom's always right (when you're five and still learning about life).
This is something I'm passionate about. I don't know if I was born with no sense of smell of it I lost it, but it was around age five that I started to notice I couldn't smell. It wasn't a big deal back then, All that concerned me at that time was not being able to smell foods, perfumes, flowers, and at that age, not being able to smell, not knowing what smell was, I brushed it off and was not interested and focused on just having fun and playing. I didn't really know stuff had smell. I picked up on that fact that poop and fart smelled stinky, and cartoons taught me pee was also bad. foods that tasted a certain way were supposed to smell like it. So sweet buns and pastries were "sweet," warm foods were generally "sweet," spicy food was "spicy" and so on. So I learned things smell like what they taste like. The stronger the taste, presumably the stronger the smell. Driving behind a truck spewing fumes smelled "bad" and somewhere I'd tasted metal, so I assumed that smog from trucks and cars smelled like "fart and acid."
However, if you were to tell me I'm disabled, my life is missing something, I should be fixed to be able to smell, I'd say no. Sure, I'd love to be able to smell something and know what the hell all the hype is about. But I've grown up with anosmia. I've grown up not being able to smell, and it's part of who I am. If there was new technology that helped me gain a sense of smell, I'd lose what made me special, I'd be able to do what others can, but I wouldn't know what to do with it. It's like dreaming and dreaming of your wedding day. No matter what happens now, you've got something to work towards. You have a purpose in life. Once your wedding day passes though, what then? What if it's not as amazing as you thought it was? Now your dream is over, and you're sucked into the world of married adults. You lose the part of you who was young and dreamy, and you can't really go back to pre-married life. you can go on to being divorced, but never to who you once were.
Now I can't say it's exactly the same for those who are hard of hearing or deaf. The sense of smell for me is small compared to the sense of hearing. But it's comparable. They grew up in a world where others could do things they couldn't do. But it doesn't stop their abilities. They are only hindered by what others say they can't do. I had it easy where I could hide my anosmia and no one could tell me I couldn't do something. They had to learn what sounds go with what actions, like a dog makes sounds when he barks, and he's not just moving his mouth. I had to learn what items and things had smell and what it smelled like. In fact I recently learned coffee has a strong odor to it. Before I told my friend, I thought coffee, which looks like brown milk smelled like brown milk which is chocolate milk which I believe smells like it tastes. And even more rare than anosmia, is temporal dysplasia, lack of sense of time. In their world they are perfectly functional and it's normal to had little or no emotion because they don't need it as far as they're concerned. However, they need to actively learn to reecognize emotions, as the Deaf community had to actively learn about what makes sound, as I had to semi-actively learn what has an odor.
As for when you meet someone lacking a sense, as with any condition, you acknowledge it if they bring it up, don't just brush it off to the side because you don't know how to talk about it. Let them do the talking. It was horrible when each time I brought it up with my mom she would brush it off and change the subject, and I couldn't talk about it, not even just to share or express myself. All I wanted was someone to listen, I wasn't asking for advice, help or anything from her.
I don't want anyone to think I speak for the Deaf, people with temporal dysplasia, or everyone who has anosmia. I am simply putting this out there for everyone who can't understand what it's like to live in a world without smell, without sense of time, without sound because they have always had these senses. It's such a deep part of a person, that its hard to imagine what a world is like without these senses. I would like people to read this and be a bit more sensitive about what you assume about people based on what senses they have, what they look like, etc. Lacking a sense is what it is. It's not abnormal, a disability, nor does it mean we are any less capable than someone with all their senses. We are perfectly normal, it's just society and the majority of humanity that tells us our lack of a sense makes us less.
Of course, there are physical limitations to what we can and can't do. With no sense of smell, I won't know if my milk has gone bad, if you just drank alcohol or ate something, or if there's smoke. But I can use my other senses and prior knowledge and logic to figure it out. Without a sense of hearing people may not know if there's a doorbell, if someone is trying to honk at you, or yelling for you to watch out for a ball coming your way. But you just need to be a bit more aware of your surroundings. Without sense of time, you just need to learn to estimate the passage of time, and recognize emotions and what it means for the person experiencing those emotions.
This is something I'm passionate about. I don't know if I was born with no sense of smell of it I lost it, but it was around age five that I started to notice I couldn't smell. It wasn't a big deal back then, All that concerned me at that time was not being able to smell foods, perfumes, flowers, and at that age, not being able to smell, not knowing what smell was, I brushed it off and was not interested and focused on just having fun and playing. I didn't really know stuff had smell. I picked up on that fact that poop and fart smelled stinky, and cartoons taught me pee was also bad. foods that tasted a certain way were supposed to smell like it. So sweet buns and pastries were "sweet," warm foods were generally "sweet," spicy food was "spicy" and so on. So I learned things smell like what they taste like. The stronger the taste, presumably the stronger the smell. Driving behind a truck spewing fumes smelled "bad" and somewhere I'd tasted metal, so I assumed that smog from trucks and cars smelled like "fart and acid."
However, if you were to tell me I'm disabled, my life is missing something, I should be fixed to be able to smell, I'd say no. Sure, I'd love to be able to smell something and know what the hell all the hype is about. But I've grown up with anosmia. I've grown up not being able to smell, and it's part of who I am. If there was new technology that helped me gain a sense of smell, I'd lose what made me special, I'd be able to do what others can, but I wouldn't know what to do with it. It's like dreaming and dreaming of your wedding day. No matter what happens now, you've got something to work towards. You have a purpose in life. Once your wedding day passes though, what then? What if it's not as amazing as you thought it was? Now your dream is over, and you're sucked into the world of married adults. You lose the part of you who was young and dreamy, and you can't really go back to pre-married life. you can go on to being divorced, but never to who you once were.
Now I can't say it's exactly the same for those who are hard of hearing or deaf. The sense of smell for me is small compared to the sense of hearing. But it's comparable. They grew up in a world where others could do things they couldn't do. But it doesn't stop their abilities. They are only hindered by what others say they can't do. I had it easy where I could hide my anosmia and no one could tell me I couldn't do something. They had to learn what sounds go with what actions, like a dog makes sounds when he barks, and he's not just moving his mouth. I had to learn what items and things had smell and what it smelled like. In fact I recently learned coffee has a strong odor to it. Before I told my friend, I thought coffee, which looks like brown milk smelled like brown milk which is chocolate milk which I believe smells like it tastes. And even more rare than anosmia, is temporal dysplasia, lack of sense of time. In their world they are perfectly functional and it's normal to had little or no emotion because they don't need it as far as they're concerned. However, they need to actively learn to reecognize emotions, as the Deaf community had to actively learn about what makes sound, as I had to semi-actively learn what has an odor.
As for when you meet someone lacking a sense, as with any condition, you acknowledge it if they bring it up, don't just brush it off to the side because you don't know how to talk about it. Let them do the talking. It was horrible when each time I brought it up with my mom she would brush it off and change the subject, and I couldn't talk about it, not even just to share or express myself. All I wanted was someone to listen, I wasn't asking for advice, help or anything from her.
I don't want anyone to think I speak for the Deaf, people with temporal dysplasia, or everyone who has anosmia. I am simply putting this out there for everyone who can't understand what it's like to live in a world without smell, without sense of time, without sound because they have always had these senses. It's such a deep part of a person, that its hard to imagine what a world is like without these senses. I would like people to read this and be a bit more sensitive about what you assume about people based on what senses they have, what they look like, etc. Lacking a sense is what it is. It's not abnormal, a disability, nor does it mean we are any less capable than someone with all their senses. We are perfectly normal, it's just society and the majority of humanity that tells us our lack of a sense makes us less.
Of course, there are physical limitations to what we can and can't do. With no sense of smell, I won't know if my milk has gone bad, if you just drank alcohol or ate something, or if there's smoke. But I can use my other senses and prior knowledge and logic to figure it out. Without a sense of hearing people may not know if there's a doorbell, if someone is trying to honk at you, or yelling for you to watch out for a ball coming your way. But you just need to be a bit more aware of your surroundings. Without sense of time, you just need to learn to estimate the passage of time, and recognize emotions and what it means for the person experiencing those emotions.
Monday, April 28, 2014
Distractaholic
I've now identified my problem. I'm no longer in denial. I don't need breaks and rewards for hours of work. What I do is procrastinate when I encounter a problem, something I don't understand. Something hard. My mind wanders and starts being productive with everythingselse. But that one thing I don't do? yea, that'll bring me down. But how can I study and do work? You can't study if you don't trust your notes. You can't study if the notes you have are missing information. you can't even google it if you don't know what the subject or concept is! So you're stuck. but you want to do it, but you w=can and then you're stuck in a study limbo where you goof off until it's too late. So now what? I've admitted my problem. isn't there some second step for me? I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a distractaholic. So what am I to do? Do I get me baby steps?
Sunday, December 8, 2013
Unfortuante events of my college life.
Ever since i moved into a dorm, nothing seems to go right. I spill nail polish remover in my pillow and laptop. Thank god that didnt die. I dropped my laptop ftom my bed because it was near the edge and i bounced on my bed. (Ok, my bad that time. But its still an accident that seems never to happen to anyone but me.) I had my period and found out too late that i bled through my sweatpants. My USB nearly stopped working on me for no reason. And for home stuff, i didnt realize my printer cord was long enough not to hav to move my extension to my table, but only after half the semester passed. I found out the bed cover i brought too late could be more comfortable after i kept readjusting it for a week. My new glasses are making my eyes worse and worse till i feel blind and have a constant headache fron using them. I have failing grades and a dead romance. Distant friends and a roomate whom i never talk to. But ive been given soooo many more opportunities than others. I finally have an accessible gym and time and places to run but my shin hurts and knees are weird. Then i get into a second bike accident before properly enjoying myself and yet again i cant run. I have a considerate roomate. An international student. I have the chance of a life time to have fun and be amazing! But i didnt take it. Adrian came and showed interest in me but i kept waiting and saying stupid things that finally pushed him away. Ive delved deeper and deeper into my own sink hole and strived for more and more when i really shouldve been enjoying the present and seeing all that ive got. My life is sooo expensive and im not paying a cent. I need new glasses, wisdom teeth appointment, cavity fixing appointment, and first aid from my two bike accidents. I also got a new samsung galaxy 3phone and that wasnt cheap. Now i need a new laptop, and right before finals!! Grrrr seriously, could i get anymore bad luck?? Ehat have i dine to justify allthis? Not that much. What have i done to deserve all this? Nothing so bad that it deserves ALLof this. Or nothing that i can remember. I constantly feel bad for everything i do, mostly because i know i go by my first instincts them reakize how that instinct may be percieved as rude and weird and i end up embarrassing myself.
I mean really, could this get anyworse? Probably, now that ive jinxed it.
Sunday, November 24, 2013
Languages
Hmm sign language, French, Or chinese? oh so many languages to learn when I can barely speak english lol
I, sadly only know english, and it's not like I'm spectacular with it. I don't have jokes and deep phrases just lined up in my head bursting to show off my intelligence. I can barely speed read or speak. Of course, this is the average american born in america with no other culture. However, atleast some of them go off to rap, sing, or learn crazy funky amazing accents that are actually quite credible. Me? Ha!
Well, my objective as of last year was to learn sign language to make up for never catching on to spanish in high school and never trying with chinese despite the efforts my parents put into it. And by parents I mean my mom. Then as of two months ago, I wanted to learn french so I could sing Yelle's amazing pop songs. Thank you pandora, for adding more to my plate. If you hadn't played such good music, I probably wouldn't be trying to learn 50 things at once. Now, as of 3 weeks ago, I wanted to learn chinese finally because I have time for a minor and have great resources and have no reason not to try again. So splurging around I found google translate and some other stuff online. But now I just don't know. What exactly should I concentrate on? You do realize amidst this crazy hectic quarter life crisis, I have school and grades to keep up for pre-med so stringent med schools don't frown upon me like those eyes that are always watching God, silently judging, right?
Life is beautiful, and life sucks. I need time, but time is so limited.
I, sadly only know english, and it's not like I'm spectacular with it. I don't have jokes and deep phrases just lined up in my head bursting to show off my intelligence. I can barely speed read or speak. Of course, this is the average american born in america with no other culture. However, atleast some of them go off to rap, sing, or learn crazy funky amazing accents that are actually quite credible. Me? Ha!
Well, my objective as of last year was to learn sign language to make up for never catching on to spanish in high school and never trying with chinese despite the efforts my parents put into it. And by parents I mean my mom. Then as of two months ago, I wanted to learn french so I could sing Yelle's amazing pop songs. Thank you pandora, for adding more to my plate. If you hadn't played such good music, I probably wouldn't be trying to learn 50 things at once. Now, as of 3 weeks ago, I wanted to learn chinese finally because I have time for a minor and have great resources and have no reason not to try again. So splurging around I found google translate and some other stuff online. But now I just don't know. What exactly should I concentrate on? You do realize amidst this crazy hectic quarter life crisis, I have school and grades to keep up for pre-med so stringent med schools don't frown upon me like those eyes that are always watching God, silently judging, right?
Life is beautiful, and life sucks. I need time, but time is so limited.
Saturday, November 23, 2013
A stroke of genius!!
"This close relationship is most apparent in how we perceive the flavors of food. As anyone with a head cold can attest, food “tastes” different when the sense of smell is impaired. Actually, what is really being affected is the flavor of the food, or the combination of taste and smell. That’s because only the taste, not the food odors, are being detected."
which is why food always tastes the same for me, since I cannot perceieve smells
http://www.brainfacts.org/sensing-thinking-behaving/senses-and-perception/articles/2012/taste-and-smell/
which is why food always tastes the same for me, since I cannot perceieve smells
http://www.brainfacts.org/sensing-thinking-behaving/senses-and-perception/articles/2012/taste-and-smell/
Saturday, November 9, 2013
Guns are ridiculous
It's ridiculous how crazy people go over guns. Even talking about it, or shapes of guns or hello kitty bubble guns. I can see how guns are dangerous, and can easily wound people and circulation of guns should be watched more carefully, but strict gun control and controlling thoughts on guns? But I can also see how people may need a gun or want a gun and all that. So what do I think about all this?
Guns are an intellectual tool created since the beginning of time. If we cannot talk about guns, can we talk about arrows and archery? Aiming? Will we go as far as darts? Essentially, we can draw this down to the very basics - we are afraid of guns because of how fast and efficiently they kill or wound others, even with minimal knowledge. Well, can't the same be said for darts, blow guns (which are just advance spit-ball guns, in case you were wondering), and anything that has a potential to hurt when thrown? Hell, you can count in knives if you want to go that far. I don't need to be trained at a circus to throw knives and aim it at a spinning wheel to know how to throw a knife and accidently hit someone. Darts are created so that it's easy enough to throw and hit someone, as long as you don't throw it backwards. I may aim for your shoulder, but I'll probably end of hitting your head, heart, throat, or other vital area. With archery, it's considered shooting. In fact, this is the primeval gun. This is where the idea of a Gun first came about, if you ever went to a history museum, went to history class, or watched TV. So why is it that we discriminate against guns and guns only being so damn dangerous? You need a licence to get it, we need to control gun circulation, we need to do this and that so guns don't end up in the wrong hands, but how about darts? you could carry a pocket full of those and start shooting people down. You can't trace these back to the owner if you didn't see them throw it, just as you can't trace a shot bullet.
Reason I even had this rant is because I was mentoring a 1st grader with reading and writing. We were working on long and short vowels. I showed him "-ame-" and he thought it was the same as aim and sure, why not? As long as he sounds it out right and doesn't start spelling "aim" instead of "ame", I could care less. Naturally, the first think anyone would think of is shooting if you talk about aim. He loves Mario, and I suppose there are some cannons (also another precursor to guns) or handheld cannon (called a gun) in mario. He started telling me about shooting in mario and guns and arrows and what not.
I could see the teacher at the printer next to me was glancing over trying to decide whether to interrupt on the subject.
My question is, should she have interrupted? The boy was doing so well pronouncing long and short "a." Should the teacher have stopped him and told him never talk about it? Or should she have just ignored it and not draw attention to it?
Guns are an intellectual tool created since the beginning of time. If we cannot talk about guns, can we talk about arrows and archery? Aiming? Will we go as far as darts? Essentially, we can draw this down to the very basics - we are afraid of guns because of how fast and efficiently they kill or wound others, even with minimal knowledge. Well, can't the same be said for darts, blow guns (which are just advance spit-ball guns, in case you were wondering), and anything that has a potential to hurt when thrown? Hell, you can count in knives if you want to go that far. I don't need to be trained at a circus to throw knives and aim it at a spinning wheel to know how to throw a knife and accidently hit someone. Darts are created so that it's easy enough to throw and hit someone, as long as you don't throw it backwards. I may aim for your shoulder, but I'll probably end of hitting your head, heart, throat, or other vital area. With archery, it's considered shooting. In fact, this is the primeval gun. This is where the idea of a Gun first came about, if you ever went to a history museum, went to history class, or watched TV. So why is it that we discriminate against guns and guns only being so damn dangerous? You need a licence to get it, we need to control gun circulation, we need to do this and that so guns don't end up in the wrong hands, but how about darts? you could carry a pocket full of those and start shooting people down. You can't trace these back to the owner if you didn't see them throw it, just as you can't trace a shot bullet.
Reason I even had this rant is because I was mentoring a 1st grader with reading and writing. We were working on long and short vowels. I showed him "-ame-" and he thought it was the same as aim and sure, why not? As long as he sounds it out right and doesn't start spelling "aim" instead of "ame", I could care less. Naturally, the first think anyone would think of is shooting if you talk about aim. He loves Mario, and I suppose there are some cannons (also another precursor to guns) or handheld cannon (called a gun) in mario. He started telling me about shooting in mario and guns and arrows and what not.
I could see the teacher at the printer next to me was glancing over trying to decide whether to interrupt on the subject.
My question is, should she have interrupted? The boy was doing so well pronouncing long and short "a." Should the teacher have stopped him and told him never talk about it? Or should she have just ignored it and not draw attention to it?
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